Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Reasons Why You Should Reconsider Allowing Your Child To Sleep In Your Bed

Being a parent is a huge monumental responsibility. You have millions of decisions to make and choices that can effect your child's future. While you may adore them to death and spending time with them is imperative, certain times of the day adults and kids need to have their own space. There are endless reasons why you reconsider allowing your child to sleep in your bed, before you allow it to continue.

Having a child sleep in your bed at any age can be habit forming. Whether they are two years old or twelve years old, it does have an impact on them. It all generally begins when the child is young, even as babies when the parents get them to stop crying at night or save them from a horrible nightmare. The kids climb into mom and dad's bed and off the habit forms! It only takes a few times before the boy or girl can truly desire to be with the parents very night. There are a few ways to satisfy your heartstrings with this want, and still remain non habit forming.

First, lay out the guidelines between you and your spouse. If your husband is dead set against the kids sleeping your bed then you have to respect that and come to some form of agreement before one of you get upset in the middle of the night. For example, make a rule that the kids can only be in your room when they are ill, have a bad dream or some terrifying weathers is going on outside. Set age limits now before they are older and it gets worse. By the time the child is seven or eight, they should have no problems getting back to sleep after a bad dream or during a rainy storm at night. Every kid is different, but you certainly do not want your kids to become codependent on you or even one of you as parents for years to come.

Girls typically crave this more often than boys do. Some boys will desire to be comforted by their moms at night, and girls may ask for dad. Either way, it has to be a respectful agreement between you and your spouse or you all may have a sleepless night. No reason to get angry at two in the morning, simply make family rules ahead of time and review them with your children so everyone is on the same page.

The reasons so many ask that you keep your kids in their own beds is the effects that it can resort to. Some kids can depend on sleeping with their parents up until they are ten years old, even later! While it may appear as a harmless act, it results in extreme codependency in some children. These children can have a hard time when they are invited to a sleepover, or the time comes when the parent cannot be at home at night and the child cannot sleep without them. It is always best to instill independence with your kids and acknowledge them for doing so.

1 comment:

  1. I have let my son get away with this. I'm guilty of it. I know I will regret it soon enough though.