Is It Just 'Normal' Behavior, Or Is it ADD?

“He's just being a normal kid.”

“Sure, she daydreams in class. She's probably just bored and needs a challenge.”

“He doesn't have a problem. The teacher just doesn't want to deal with him.”

“She's just being lazy.”

“Well, maybe if he'd pay attention in class and not stare at the girls, he'd make decent grades.”

These are but a few things parents might think or say when they hear their child has Attention-Deficit Disorder. It's no wonder-disorders like this have been obscenely over-diagnosed and over-medicated over the past decade or so. But how can you tell if your child actually does have a problem? If he does, what can you do about it? Here are some things you should know.

There are two main attention-deficit disorders-Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). These disorders are actually difficult to diagnose because they share symptoms with other things-including 'just being a kid' or 'misbehaving'. For children with ADD/ADHD, however, they are to a degree where they cause problems across a wide spectrum of the child's life-home, school, play, etc. In some cases, the symptoms can continue into adulthood. I have ADHD myself, so I know this from experience.

One of the main indicators of ADD/ADHD is inattention. For instance, a child with ADD/ADHD might not seem to be listening when they are directly spoken to. It might appear that your child isn't paying attention or thinking before s/he acts, but that's not the case at all. Rather, the thoughts are moving so fast that they can't always be processed. They may have a hard time following directions, staying on task or finishing what they start. They might make careless mistakes, be forgetful or be reluctant to do anything that requires a lot of attention and effort. While most kids (and adults!) will do these things from time to time, it's not a common occurrence. With ADD/ADHD, it is.

The other common problems with ADD/ADHD are impulsivity and hyperactivity. Sometimes a child with ADD/ADHD will still display behaviors-fidgeting, picking at things, etc-that other children their age have grown out of. One big problem I still have is called 'pressured speech'-interrupting people, blurting out the answers before the question is even finished, etc. It's almost as though my brain is constantly on 'overdrive'. It's also not uncommon for children with ADD/ADHD to constantly squirm in their seats, talk out of turn or have a hard time with 'quiet' activities.

If your child *does* indeed have ADD/ADHD, what can you do about it? The good news is that, with some combination of medication and therapy, ADD/ADHD is very manageable. Believe it or not, the medications are usually some form of amphetamine or 'speed'. Due to the brain chemistry involved in ADD/ADHD, however, these drugs have the opposite effect; they slow the brain down rather than speeding it up. It sounds strange, but can be very helpful. Either way, see the doctor. It may take a bit of 'trial and error' to find the treatment for ADD/ADHD that works best for your child, but it's worth the effort.

The Symptoms of Oppositional Defiant Disorder

Many kids suffer from being labeled as "bad kids". Unfortunately, this is a common problem with teachers, parents, and even some doctors that just don not have the tools to properly test these children for the right ailments. Millions of children are suffering today from the symptoms of Oppositional Defiant Disorder.

But what exactly is ODD? Some symptoms of the disorder are:

• The child will not listen to adults
• The child can be angry even resentful
• The child is argumentative with adults
• The child tends to blame other people for their mistakes
• The child does not make or keep a lot of friends
• The child gets into trouble frequently at school
• The child has a bad temper
• The child is somewhat spiteful in their actions
• The child may be revengeful
• The child can be described as vengeful
• The child can be annoyed very quickly

Generally, it tends to develop by the time the child is at the age of eight. However, it can begin as early as four or five years old.  It effects boys more often than girls.

The type of children that are given this medical diagnosis are ones that have suffered from these symptoms for about six months in a row. Their behaviors have to be advancing past what is considered to be "normal" in the broad scheme of things. A specialist will need to evaluate them for a bit and put them on some form of plan to start clearing the brain from these thoughts. Most doctors will rebuild the children's thought process by having them enlist in therapy of some form. Many use sessions alone, while others have found that family counseling can be very effective. Specifically, the parent to child interaction sessions seem to greatly improve these children's lives. The therapists have ways of getting the parents and kids to work together toward this common family goal versus putting all of the blame on the child and leaving the work up to them.

Finally, try to have patience with your kids. This is a hard time for everyone involved from parents, to children to teachers and siblings in the home. Gather your game plan and sit down with the whole crew to discuss it. Go about your plans with the expectation that your child may not be game for it, but they must attend the therapy sessions or which ever route you ultimately decide on using. Try to emphasize that you are all doing this as team and also be sure to include his or her teachers at school with the future plans on correcting the behaviorism. Realize that it won't change overnight, but that it will change as time goes by in just a few weeks you should be seeing a mild difference.

Do You Suspect Your Teen Is On Drugs?

Being the parent of a teenager can be a very challenging process. Some days it may seem as if you live with someone you don't even know, others they may be your best friend. Sons and daughters both have the same issues, they simply choose to express them differently. Many parents have great relationships with their kids that are teens, and do not let this discourage you with your own relationship with your teen, it is completely normal to have some troubles when your kids are growing into adults.

Think back when you were a teenager. There may be some things you were allowed to do that you wouldn't be caught dead permitting your kids to do. Times certainly have changed, and in the process kids today have gotten much smarter at hiding things and getting what they want out of their parents. Asking for additional allowance every week is a bit less extreme over your kids experimenting with drugs. Currently, there is a huge epidemic with teenagers and drug use and unfortunately most parents say they never had a clue this was going on.

Knowing the signs of early detection for teen drug use can literally save your child's life:

~Being more aloof or alone

~Significant weight loss or gain

~Hanging out with different friends

~Getting poor grades in school

~Losing interest in the family activities

~A large change in their attitude

~Your teen wearing different clothing

~Having a new boyfriend or girlfriend in their lives

~Strange or unusual behaviors

~Being disrespectful

If your teen is showing any of these signs, make sure to begin addressing them as soon as possible. The longer you wait, the bigger problem your child may develop. Kids often try drugs just because they assume it is something everyone does at that age, and because they want to fit in. Talk to your kids as openly as you can be about the topic and do not have discussions that show your anger or disappointment. When you become defensive, they have an instant reason to go back into their shells and not discuss it. Stay positive and advise them they can have fun in other means. Choosing better friendships and having a reward system for getting good grades never hurt anyone either. All kids, even teens want to have money and items to obtain the things they want. Use this to your advantage when making a plan to help your teen.

In the event your teen truly has an issue that needs to be addressed, ensure you begin correcting it immediately. Consult with your doctor and perhaps even a therapist for further instructions. If your child has a significant problem, make the intervention today and there are endless certified ones in your area that can greatly help you accomplish this meaningful task.